Ryan Rhoades

Ryan Rhoades

Relapse–Don’t Loose Heart

The Thoughts After Recovery

It is safe to say that anyone who has struggled with addiction is never immune to tempting and dangerous thoughts. It is a strange thing to have made it through the hard part of the recovery process and still struggle with the idea of using. To think about going back to a lifestyle that is so destructive and detrimental to the lives of the user and the user’s friends and family. I call it strange because after becoming sober, truly confronting your past, and going through the painful process of reconciling with that past, the devastation caused is so clear. However, we feel that inevitable pull from the darkness. So, why does such a horrible lifestyle continue to haunt us after we have been sober for some time? How can we effectively and successfully battle these urges?

What is a Relapse?

First, let’s address the stigma of a “relapse”. The world and it’s “performance model of success” wants us to believe that we have failed the process and therefore, we must go back to the start. But if we believe with our hearts that we have already been forgiven and we are indeed living in a “purifying process” (sanctification) of life in Christ, then we don’t have to be haunted by these thoughts.

Words of the Lord the helped me through my addiction and recovery include:

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” – 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

“Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange was happening to you.” – 1 Peter 4:12

I believe another answer for anyone dealing with this type of struggle after recovering from an addiction is the simple fact that we are indeed creatures of routine. There is a great book by Charles Duhigg called, The Power of Habit, in which he describes the physiological processes of our brains after a habit is formed. In short, our brain activity drastically decreases upon the formation of a habit. For example, when we back out of the driveway it is so ingrained in our unconscious, so routine that our brain doesn’t have to work very hard to complete the task. This very same thing happens in drug use and relapse- it is ingrained in our mind. Therefore, we have to form new habits in order to replace the harmful old ones.

Battling the Thoughts and Urges

How can we effectively and successfully battle these urges? It is almost a cliché to say, “fill the void”, but that is indeed what must be done. One of the most important things I have learned in my journey to be free from my addiction is that my using was a form of idol worship. I believe every single person fills their respective void with something. I believe this is a unique trait to every individual’s own human make up. In my own life, the only way that I can be free from the haunting pull of returning to my demons in drug use is to fill my thoughts and actions with the words of God and a desire to know Him more intimately.

“God has put eternity (or curiosity/ignorance) into our hearts and no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” – Ecclesiastics 3:11

We are contemplative and inquisitive people who throughout our history have searched for meaning in spirituality. It is our formed opinions and beliefs about the spiritual world that shape our thoughts, actions, and desires. This quest or desire for something bigger than ourselves is at the very center of our existence. Once you start to consider that God is real, then the pursuit of anything other than a life led by Him seems so insignificant.

Recovery and Christianity

In my own life, I eventually had to succumb to the idea that there is a God. Then I had to decide what that looked like, or rather, which God was real to me. I love the Christian faith for so many reasons. One reason is that the stories are verifiable. Our New Testament (along with the Old Testament) tells the story of a transformation of religious customs and traditions by the death and resurrection of Jesus, bringing salvation to any who would believe and pursue Him. The story fulfills years of prophecy which can be traced throughout writings from hundreds and thousands of years previous.

After his death and resurrection, the New Testament tells the story of how this truth of the word of the Lord spread across the known world. With that, there was also the persecution that came to those who chose to spread the beliefs of the Christian faith. What is so amazing to me about this story is how many different people gave account to the same thing. I use to think, how is Christianity any different from a modern-day cult? One simple, yet powerful argument is that the men and women who were the first ones through the door of modern Christianity were continuously imprisoned, beaten, and murdered in horrendous ways. Why would so many people so passionately pursue something that wasn’t real when they knew that it meant a life lived in poverty and quite probably, torture and painful death?

All of this is important, but the main reason I choose to believe in Jesus Christ is because of what he stood for. Some words from the Bible that further my belief in a life led by my beliefs are:

“Now the tax collectors and sinners were all gathering around to hear Jesus, but the Pharisees and teachers of the law muttered, ‘this man welcomes sinners and eats with them.’’ – Luke 15:1-2

Tax collectors in the time of Jesus have no comparison by today’s standards. In that time, the land was under Roman rule by way of the Roman army. Roman soldiers were beyond cruel. Imagine a foreign army invades, rapes and murders your family, and then they hire your neighbor to collect taxes from you to be given back to the very army that raped and murdered your family. This was the role of the tax collector in the time of Jesus, and yet he spoke with them, ate with them, loved them, and offered them salvation.

This is the what I choose to fill my void with – the pursuit of righteousness by way of Jesus Christ. Once set upon that path, temptations do not disappear, but they do diminish drastically.

S2L Recovery Healing Addicts in Middle Tennessee

Our S2L Recovery community constantly reminds us of the importance of a life through Jesus Christ. Through his words and teachings, we can help addicts journey down the path of recovery and the blossoming and nourishment of the Christian faith. If you or someone you love is struggling with a drug or alcohol addiction, please reach out to us and let us help you towards recovery!

Home from REHAB, No More Bubble!

The Journey of Returning Home From Rehab

I have been home for almost three days now. While I was a student at S2L Recovery in Middle Tennessee, one of the things I heard most from staff and alumni was how difficult it is to stay diligent once you leave “the bubble.” Already, I have found this to be true. At S2L there are seven simple principles taught which can be found inside the pages of Lost and Found: Recovery in Christ. Inside of these teachings are four pillars:

  1. Pray
  2. Read your Bible
  3. Fellowship with good people
  4. Serve others

I should clarify although these are simple in principle and they are much harder in the application. As recovering addicts we want to stay true to these four disciplines, however, upon departure from a rehabilitation program, distractions come at you exponentially high rate. If you ask students who have been through a program repeatedly what they were lacking when they went back out into the real world, the answer is almost unanimously – lack of diligence, not lack of desire.

So, I ask myself, how do I maintain my discipline in these areas? How do I avoid or sift through the distractions and prioritize things? Before coming to S2L Recovery, I would often ignore details in my life. However, when we brush the small things off that require our attention, often the more important things in our lives begin to crumble. Indeed, the big things are often held together by the smaller things. Not just metaphorically, but literally. It is the cement between the bricks that hold a house together. You can’t have a piece of fabric without string. Why shouldn’t this apply to the tasks in our everyday lives?

Learning to Conquer the Distractions After Rehab

I am aware of what I need to do on a daily basis to continue in a life with Christ and sustain from drugs and/or alcohol, but if I do not implement those four pillars, I need to take a look at my priorities. It takes more than just a desire. I need to consistently tend to the details of my life. To do lists can be helpful, but only if you complete the tasks on the list. Personally, I need more than a to-do list. In my own life, it becomes more and more apparent how many bad habits I had and still have apart from drugs and alcohol. I never made my bed, I would wake up and scroll through social media, news headlines, and my hygiene even suffered.

Tending to the small things in my life now starts with making the bed when I wake up. As the director of S2L Recovery often says, “If you make your bed when you get up, you have already accomplished something for the day.” It is a small detail, but it is a small detail that can set the tone and pace for your entire day. Now instead of laying in bed all morning, I am up with a made bed, and I have the motivation to pray to God and to read his Word.

Believe me, if making your bed can set the tone for your day, talking with the Lord can transform your day. If you’re struggling to do the big things in your everyday life, then pay attention to the details that you have prioritized and continue down the path of recovery.

S2L Recovery Providing Faith-Based Rehabilitation Programs in Middle TN

If you or someone you know is struggling with an addiction, it’s time to take the step in a full recovery. Leading a Christian rehabilitation center has allowed S2L Recovery to changes lives and fulfill the word of the Lord. Please contact us today and let us help you discover peace through recovery and God.

“We want each of you to stay diligent until the very end, so that your hope may be fully assured” – Hebrews 6:11